my smile

i hide my fears behind my smile 
knowing that i'm in denial
 i know that i'm insecure
 i am just not sure 
my morbid life
 is black and white
 and i will not put up a fight
 it's suicide
 without a guide
 it's torture
 and martyrdom
 but it's not like i'm calm
 and not like i'm alright 
and the future is not bright 



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